Ich bin kaputt: The Truth About Learning the German Language

While it might be true that learning a language is not connected to general intellectual giftedness whatsoever,  you simply cannot dismiss that it doesn’t involve as much intellectual relevance as Philosophy or Social Sciences.

I have been attending university for a German language course. And for almost four months, everything has been an uphill climb. Unlike English, where there are no complicated word order patterns and gender in inanimate objects, the intricacies of Deutsch right off the bat tells you that it’s not to be messed with. I kid you not. Learning Deutsch is like tinkering a high-end Cisco router due to bandwidth congestion. Excuse me for the technical jargon. I couldn’t think of a more fitting description.

My basic Deutsch course is nearing its end and it has left me conflicted. I seem to have developed a love-hate feeling toward the language. I love it just because. No, of course I will not leave you hanging. I love the language because I want to be a nurse in Germany. I mean, it comes with the job I am passionate about, so loving the language makes it a part of my commitment. Plus, there’s Goethe and Schiller. I am big on poetry and literature so there‘s that too. I figured that it‘s just difficult not to love the pioneers of a movement that emphasized on individualism, nature and feeling.

For some reason, I can’t seem to validate my hate for learning the language. It’s probably just my self-loathing for not being able to equate my passion to the actual demands of learning. I am gutted.

So much for an end to this narrative, I am dispelling all the negative waves in the atmosphere.

Guten Tag alle zusammen! 😊☺️🙃🙂

Rochelle Villaflor ©️04/11/2018

woman

this ain't no drama,
this ain't no whore swag
this verse is for women
who fight for the real cause
domestic abuse,
sex trafficking,
gender discrimination,
ageism,
and all the other isms.
this ain't a woman
who just takes a man's seed
as well as his curses
and fears his fist.
this is a woman,
who's got her own thing
pays her bills
and buys her bling
a homemaker
a teacher
a mother
a thinker
an artist.
a woman,
with tongue like blade,
courage of steel,
with a soft heart
that nurtures and heals
yes, I am a woman
I like roses
but I prefer a revolution.

~ beautifulbruises©2012

Purpleskies

missed the last train
from Clapham Junction

a few seconds late
and 3 hours away to the
first train to Sutton
enduring the biting -10 centigrade
chasing that fire
that little chance of you and me
trying to buy myself out
an alibi that isn't too far-fetched
that negotiates with my truth
grants my heart's desires
oh the bargaining
my sweet little sleazebag.

~ beautifulbruises©2011, RochelleVillaflor©2011

     

For me to be creative... I am waiting for...

1. inspiration

2. the stakes to be higher

3. cure to cancer

4. a remedy to my writer's block

6. logic to prevail

7. wars to end

8. volunteer for charity

9.  a good book

10.  a healthier lifestyle

11.  a day spent at the art museum

12.  be more empathic

14.  be current without being corrupted

15. shorter lines at the grocery

17. aches and pains to subside/ a good release/ catharsis

19. a miracle to happen

20. the stakes to be lower

21. proposals to turn down

22. Billy Joel to write and record new songs

23.  travels

24. a good laugh

25.  love someone unconditionally

26. a skydive… or a bunjee jump

27. unlearning the obsolete

28. to be FREE

29. CHANGE

30. YOU after Me.

©RochelleVillaflor2014

hey

i don't need a personal jesus

to validate my deeds

i don't want to be your missus

and submit to your greed

i don't need a compass

to direct my course in this life

i don't want to be your carcass

not your fool, not your wife.

better half

looking back 

on our yesterdays

where i draw my strength from

a love that seemed 

like a promise of forever

who would have known

my better half 

would turn into a stranger

devoid of feeling

oh, the hurting.

trying to hold back my tears

as our now becomes

a little more painful each day

broken things 

should not be thrown away

so they say

but i learnt

time would not glue them back together

they're never the same ~

i am not the same. 

~ beautifulbruises©2013