"It is so much easier to claim weirdness than beat my brains out trying to rationalize my behavior for acceptance."
As a child who grew up in a dysfunctional family, life was pretty tough. I never had friends because no one could relate to me, that's why it was very difficult reaching out to others.
They were always well-behaved and I wasn't. It was very frustrating that nobody wanted me because they thought I was strange. Well, yeah. I was, a little. If by it you meant cheeky, but not in an evil way. But I was more like the, ''let's hide grandpa's dentures before lunch time!" or "let's put nana's smelly knickers inside dad's lunchbox!"
kind of cheeky. Mwahahaha
I would say the most twisted stuff as a joke, (which I thought was really hilarious btw.) in my seemingly casual attempt at being social. And I would get the most repulsive look. Like, come on you guys, chill. I didn't really mean any harm! It was just my imagination that had, well, strayed a little too far. lol
But whatever, i still think most people have no sense of humor! ;D
I guess, that from being rejected most of the time, I have learned to love being alone. I have never known myself better; reached out to myself, met my own needs, became more introspective and discovered my truths and my art.
Music and poetry have kept me sane, my escape from reality. I was lucky to have been blessed the gift of transcendence in a certain way that prevented me from doing things that would break me or make me lose my sense of purpose. Life is way too complicated and worrying about it would not make it any simpler. If things go wrong, you can always turn it around. It's about choice and having the courage to live through the toughest times with hope and a good laugh. ;)
